So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Congratulations! We have a period
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
