My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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