do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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