32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Randomize
