i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
