The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
We need to rekindle our bromance
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Why is there bacon in the couch?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
