I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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