covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Come on in and take your pants off
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