I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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