I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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