I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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