He asked to "fluff my boner.."
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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