Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I have tasted many bathrooms
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize