Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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