Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I think I died a long time ago.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
