I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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