sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
