Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
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