i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
