okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
