What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
it's like iHOP with fire
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo