ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize