it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
