the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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