There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
