I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
