she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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