They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
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