I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
