why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
