Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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