note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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