I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize