My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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