Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
