Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize