I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I've blown a few things in my day
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
PANTIES FOUND
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