Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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