don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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