Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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