Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
