oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
