But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
