That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
