I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Green mimosas i think yes
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
