So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I miss vodka workout Fridays
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Randomize
