Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
