my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
