isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
