Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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